Maybe it was partly triggered by the father's reaction to Ella yesterday, but I came to the realisation that I had been a bit standoffish towards her. As if I was afraid to get too attached to Ella before. I've now totally fallen in love with her it seems and am more in tune with her.
Yesterday the father came round (to walk the dog, never to see the baby!
) and we ended up having a beer (I had a stout) in the backyard. When I got up after a little while to go and check on Ella who was asleep on my bed, he offered to check on her. I just gave him the instruction to check if she was still asleep and still breathing and off he went. I started to get worried after he had gone for what seemed ages. When I finally went inside to put in a load of washing (and make sure all was ok), he hurried out of the bedroom holding Ella like a precious treasure. He gave her back to me outside.
Lateron I went inside to change her nappy. But when I had put her on the change table and had undone the dirty nappy, I got a headrush and felt so dizzy I had to go sit down immediately. So I asked the father to finish changing her nappy! It seemed so strange. Us both there, me giving him instructions (probably was the first time in his life he changed a nappy) and him trying his best to do a good job and looking slightly awkward. It was like we were playing mum and dad!
He was fortunate too, she didn't poo or wee while he was changing her, something she regularly does when I do it!
I think he's definitely under her spell now! And how could anyone not be, hey.
It'll be interesting to see when he'll admit to having fallen in love with her too.
Edited to add:
This post probably didn't make all that much sense. My sleep deprived, endorphine soaked brain has trouble stringing 2 sentences together and I'm always in a hurry.
What I meant by me being standoffish was that I was so focussing on the practical things, mainly making sure Ella got enough milk, that I didn't have much attention for her as a person. I didn't take the time to think about what a miracle she really is. Now I take her cues and enjoy those times when she's awake and happy to look at her, talk to her and play with her more.
And regarding the father: it was just the way he looked at her, the way he held her as if she was the world's most precious thing and how he was interested in all I had to say about caring for a little baby that made me think he's fallen in love with her head over heels...
Yesterday the father came round (to walk the dog, never to see the baby!
) and we ended up having a beer (I had a stout) in the backyard. When I got up after a little while to go and check on Ella who was asleep on my bed, he offered to check on her. I just gave him the instruction to check if she was still asleep and still breathing and off he went. I started to get worried after he had gone for what seemed ages. When I finally went inside to put in a load of washing (and make sure all was ok), he hurried out of the bedroom holding Ella like a precious treasure. He gave her back to me outside.Lateron I went inside to change her nappy. But when I had put her on the change table and had undone the dirty nappy, I got a headrush and felt so dizzy I had to go sit down immediately. So I asked the father to finish changing her nappy! It seemed so strange. Us both there, me giving him instructions (probably was the first time in his life he changed a nappy) and him trying his best to do a good job and looking slightly awkward. It was like we were playing mum and dad!
He was fortunate too, she didn't poo or wee while he was changing her, something she regularly does when I do it!
I think he's definitely under her spell now! And how could anyone not be, hey.
It'll be interesting to see when he'll admit to having fallen in love with her too.
Edited to add:
This post probably didn't make all that much sense. My sleep deprived, endorphine soaked brain has trouble stringing 2 sentences together and I'm always in a hurry.
What I meant by me being standoffish was that I was so focussing on the practical things, mainly making sure Ella got enough milk, that I didn't have much attention for her as a person. I didn't take the time to think about what a miracle she really is. Now I take her cues and enjoy those times when she's awake and happy to look at her, talk to her and play with her more.
And regarding the father: it was just the way he looked at her, the way he held her as if she was the world's most precious thing and how he was interested in all I had to say about caring for a little baby that made me think he's fallen in love with her head over heels...
Lin
